In My Head vs. Real Life

How the conversation went in my head….

Saleswoman:  “Oh, I have the perfect jacket to go with that shirt!  Everyone who sees it loves it!”

Me:  “No thanks.  Not really looking for a jacket right now.”

Saleswoman:  “No really, you’ve got to see it!  What size are you?  Oh, you’re tiny!  I’ll get one for you.”

Me:  “Your flattery and Jedi mind tricks will not work on me, shameless sales-hussy.”

Saleswoman:  “Nonsense!  Just try it!  It’s so rich and elegant; you’d never guess it’s machine washable.”

Me: “Unhand me, you commission-based shrew!”

Saleswoman:  “See?  It looks fabulous on you.  You should be a model.”

Me:  “Model Schmodel!  I am immune to your manipulative sales tactics!”

Saleswoman:  “Please!  I beg of you!  It would be a crime against fashion for you to leave without this jacket!”

[The saleswoman flies across the room as my roundhouse kick smacks her square in the jaw.  I exit the store with a cocky smirk, wearing the jacket.]

 

 

How the conversation really went….

Saleswoman:  “Oh, I have the perfect jacket to go with that shirt!  Everyone who sees it loves it!”

Me:  “Um…  OK.”

Saleswoman:  “See?  It looks good on you.”

Me:  “Um…  OK.”

Saleswoman:  “I’ll ring it up.”

 

 

 

 

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